While President Bush is sending mass numbers of troops off to get sniped, Hilary Clinton is planning to move into the White House, and Pastor Ted Haggard is the world's best kept secret... Same-sex marriage and Christian Sex Scandals are exposing the real side of Christians that really give Christianity a bad name. Every human is contradictory in some way or another, but Christians exploit hypocracy to infinite degrees often without thoroughly examining and identifying their own logic.

So I thought I would invite a Christian Sex Test which is really designed for the "Holy Roller Christians" who are basically walking devils. If you are not one of those people, I invite you to take the FREE Christian Sex Test just for fun, and pass it along to one of those "Christians".

It's very simple. You enter in your data and based on [the mindset of hypocritical/split-personality Christians] your birthday (astrology), amount of times you have sexual thoughts, and amount of times you pray - it will tell you whether you are going to Heaven Or Hell. If you test positive, you go straight to hell no questions asked, if you and your lover test negative, then you go to heaven. This is how Christianity is tainted to work according to fundamentalist and hypocritical Christians.

Why Would Ted Haggard Go To Heaven

As much as God fearing Christians (ie: Govenor Rick Perry) condem you to hell, execute prisoners, threaten to kill homosexuals, and cringe at the thought of same-sex marriage; Ted Haggard is now a good example of the average Christian. He makes mistakes, has a few things he's not proud of, but perhaps he is trying to follow in the steps of Jesus. For any Christian who lost respect, hates, or thinks Ted Haggard is less than a man - The Christian Sex Hypocracy Test is for YOU! Click Here To Take It. .

Generally, the three things that matter to Christians most are: Sex, Heaven, and Hell. Christians hate talking about sex, they just can not do it without feeling like they are headed straight to a burning hell. But they also hate the thought of going to hell so bad, they will growl at you and curse you to hell, if you refuse to accept the ideology behind their beliefs. These Christians are only Christians based on the exclusive fear of death and living a life in a burning hell as predetermined by their fabricated ruler of the earth. The true matter gnawing at the brain is that no one wants to die, especially not young...and just like radical Islams believe they will reach a promised land with willing virgins, radical Christians believe they too will reach a promised land with milk and honey and streets paved with Gold.

Or Maybe Rick Perry Is Going To Hell First

Just two days ago Govenor Rick Perry indirectly echoed a theory that all non-Christians are going to hell, but it was another Christian preacher, another republican preacher seeking to profit from the fall of a bigger and more popular preacher - Ted Haggard. But at this point, don't you think that there will be more "Christians" in hell than any other living organism on the face of this God created earth? I wanted to find out how many people are really going to hell so I made a tool to see what it would be like if we were judged by our sexual desires. I know what you did last night - Learn more about Christian Sex Test.

It is absolutely easy for Christians to fail their quest to see a world saved and led to Christ as long as they coninue to lose the battle of religion vs. sexual desires by a wide margin. Christians use so much of their time playing god that they have no time to recognize their own faults and sins. More than a decade ago big A list preacher Jimmy Swaggart was caught with a prostitute and lost his ministry because of it. Losing an operation that yields profits well over a million dollars per year would be devastating, but somehow Christians and the american public found it in their hearts to forgive him.

The Whole Christian Sex Scandal

Now we have Mike Jones, who surfaces out of nowhere and puts Ted Haggard in the hypocrite spotlight. Another Monica Lewinsky scandal so far, except that some of Mike Jones' testimonials are logicless and untrue. But who cares. We forgave Bill, we'll forgive Ted too.

Not many people have commented or mentioned the fact that Ted Haggard condemned another popular preacher, Bishop Carlton Pearson of Tulsa, Oklahoma. Bishop Pearson believed there was no hell, but the hell on earth and perhaps all of us - gays, lesbians, heteros, were all going to heaven because God is an including God rather than the excluding punishing God we imagine him to be. Thus, if Ted Haggard believes in hell, then surely he has reserved his seat. Govenor Rick Perry will more than gladly pull the level on executing that death-penatly.

In as much as these Christians proclaim the gospel of Christ, they are walking and talking bacteria devils that no hedonism or burning man could ever replicate and no God would ever love. You know the ones, take Godhatesfags for example.

It is because of situations like the Ted Haggard scandal that make it evidently clear that Christians maintain and nurture religous delusions on an everyday basis. The three primary beliefs all Christians should have and display through their words and daily actions:

• The only way to heaven is by and through accepting Jesus Christ (John 3:16)
• Repent for your sins with a pure heart and you will be forgiven
• Jesus Loves You (a spin of - What Would Jesus Do)

When you think of Ted Haggard, you think of a fallen pastor - but I think of a greater breed of true Christianity. What other Christian can and would so easily admit his faults, accept an interview, and then write such a powerful letter referring to himself as a liar and deceiver. If Ted is not your definition of what a true Christian is, then I don't know what is. Ted did the following things wrong:

• Committed Adultery
• Lied
• Misled his followers

The average non-Christian is going to spend more time talking about what Ted did wrong than what he did right. I can understand that, but I want to point out all the things he did right.

He showed that Christians are not perfect - even though (some) Christians may try to seem like it.

He bravely accepted an interview from a reporter, who more than once tried to catch him in a lie.

• He spoke the truth.
• He asked for forgiveness.
• He reframed the whole conversation towards himself and the mistakes he made which allowed him to keep his dignity while leaving no room for assumptions, backbiting, or he-say-she-say.
• He did the above in such a genuniely truthful end-all manner that allowed him to state the new plans and direction for his life; and take the time to resolve his matters.
• He bravely admited that he needed help and would seek guidance and therapy.
• He made it a lot easier for Christians to talk about same-sex marriage and homosexuality.

How cool it must be for Ted Haggard to experience this situation and find out who his friends really are. While you are walking around pointing fingers and having water cooler conversations, this man has exemplified on all accounts that Christianity is about the goal of making serious and consistent efforts to live a better life that is pleasing to God, even when some failures and sexual sins dominate others. Is it not the goal of Christianity to help the fallen brother? It's amazing how a person's money making enterprise, that is design to help in cases like Ted Haggard's - fails at his very purpose.

Hypocracy From Governing Christians

"It is with great regret - and after much prayer and discussion with friends and family - that I have had to reconsider my involvement in the panel overseeing Ted's restoration," Dobson said in a written statement. "Emotionally and spiritually, I wanted to be of help - but the reality is I don't have the time to devote to such a critical responsibility." James Dobson

I wonder how much it would cost Dr. Dobson, financially, to help out his fellow "brother-in-christ." It is a great possibility that the association and stressful involvement with Ted Haggard could be bad publicity, bad association, and a rapid decline of monetary capital, but there is no excuse available for such a powerful "healer" and "Christian Psychologist" to renege and refuse to offer help to Ted Haggard. Sex...is too hard to talk about, it costs too much, and takes up too much time. What was the point of even offering help, I bet you are trained to think thoroughly before you offer solutions to the "radio listeners".

I didn't think Ted Haggard should get counseling from Christians until maybe a year from now. I'm sorry but why continue to get disappointed by people who mattered most to you, when you can get real help; the best 5 star help from total strangers - who know nothing about you and do not pass judgement? I know, I know it's easier to interact with a staff and talk on the radio to a microphone that won't talk back. What is Dr. James Dobson thinking? Didn't you pray and talk to God about offering your help before you offered it? If not, why do you endorse malpractice?

But look at how fast this ia happening, all of the people who seemed to be so real are suddenly...just like us. The majority of them cannot live up to half of the facade and worldview they "claim" to live in unless it fits their personal motives for wealth, power, or acceptance. While being interviewed about the expressed 'Hell is on earth and not in the ground' theory of his old college friend Carlton Pearson, Ted Haggard rebutted that Hell is infact a real place, and I have a video clip to prove it. I wonder if he believes in the hell on earth theory now. At this point, Carlton Pearson seems to be the only friend that will be around to help him, because all other "Christians" have proven to be nothing more than conditional friends with a hypocrisy disorder only interested in their own selfish efforts of self-preservation.

Best "Christian" Sexuality Videos

Below you'll find some videos. The first, is where Joel Osteen plainly says it's not his place to judge who goes to Heaven and who goes to Hell. With a church membership of over 30,000, you would expect more people to follow his lead. The third video, is the way I think it should be - if you watch the video you will see Christians who are laid back, not making a scene, not making anyone angry. But unfortunately in Ted Haggard's situation, these kind of true real Christians were not around.

Kudos to Stan (aka:IndianaJesusFreak) for putting together a truthful video. Unfortunately, this type of interaction is hard to come by. The second video is a good example of the people this campaign is targeting. Here is a link to find more incredibly offensive gay-hate crimes from more "Christian" fundamentalists.

• Hate Crime Movie
• Defense of Marriage Act
• How To Be Gay And Christian - @ Ehow.com
• More Great Politics Regarding Defense of Marriage
• Great Video - Of the Cathedral Of Hope Church - the largest gay Church in the US?
• Popular Jimmy Swaggart Video - Making insensitive comment (though he did apologize!)
• Tyra Banks Video Interviewing Christian Fundamentalists who totally Disrespect Gays (more reasons why this page exists)

My point here is to end the "care fraud". If you are a Christian and claim to care, but don't - then I consider that to be fraud. I do not claim to know, and do not even want the responsibility of knowing who is going to Heaven or Hell. If there was a way to really know, I think someone like Richard Dawkins (the world's most popular living Atheist) would have cashed in on it by now.

I am more than happy to get your feedback, comments, and questions, so please join the Christian Sexuality discussion. I apologize for the extra effort and extra click, but for technical reasons(CGI Programming), I could not figured it was best to not try to fit this app into a regular blog.

Disclaimer: The Ted Haggard Website Screenshot Was Manipulated In Photoshop, and Shown Only To Prove A Point!